Beauty Seen is Never Lost

My hands brushed over their worn-out spines swiftly. Their bold titles flashed intensly.With closed eyes, I still know them one by one.

You, you were there when the cadence of time ceased to tick; when air became as thick as lead; when there was nothing more to grasp but that poised rope of prayer. You shielded my teeming mind, numbing all the “ what if’s” and instead, you placed that vivid, vastness of blue ; The Atlantic. Endless, that’s what it was. My eyes saw no borders, no beginnings,and no ends. Nothing but that mystifying vasteness of blue. The wind, and the rays of that raging sun, engulfed me and filled my nostrils with that misty scent of seaweeds, of hunger, of misery. But it wasn’t mine. It belonged to that shadow of a boy, on the wooden raft, in the middle, of nowhere. That ocean, and its catastrophic beauty. You, you gave me that glimpse of a landscape; that glimpse of an abstract; and you whispered. “ There is the universe, there is the earth, there is the deep abyss of the ocean, and then another, and then another, and then there is that boy and his misery; a dot that barely matters. Look outside that head of yours, every once in a while”.



You, you were there when that tiny illustrated plane on the screen seemed permanently paused; when the edges of that seat were bruised from the might of my clutch. You, showered me with snow; soft, feathery flakes that made me wonder if that was the taste of the clouds hovering outside my window. My bones were chilled, and I knew of a winter, that came in July.


You, you were there when those night devils crowned my body; when darkness made me almost heave out of loneliness; when I mourned yesterday’s death and feared tomorrow’s birth. You were there, with that breathtaking garden of secrets; and curiosity gnawed at me. Petals of blooming flowers, daffodils and bluebells, filled my usually tear-drenched pillow. And that sweet perfume of theirs chased the night devils away.



You, you were there when grief swept the grounds beneath me; when those heart muscles of mine were beyond repair; when scents, voices, and faces assaulted every fiber of my being. You tickled me with your oozing sarcasm, with your twisted sense of humor, and that world of nonsense you took me to. And with you, i laughed. Wholeheartedly.

My fingers, traced those spines; one shelf, after the other, trying to get a feel of those lives; a billion of them. A billion of universes, some I was thrown into, others awaiting my arrival, with an easing hand, ready to be placed on that loud, disastrous mind. One day, I tell them, one day, ill conquer you all. One day, ill have a spine of my own, stretching an easing hand to someone else.

Posted by Diddlina at 1:43 PM