Beauty Seen is Never Lost

In her loving memory,

The invisible camera was dangling off her limp neck. She stood there, right in front of them, a shadow of a ghost stealing glimpses of what could’ve been. They were playing charades, impersonating their favorite cartoon characters; and that innocent laughter almost made her lifeless heart beat. How much they’ve grown. No longer crawling, no longer teething, no longer drawing crooked alphabetical shapes on walls, no. They were beautiful, well-grown individuals now. She looked at Fay, who was lying on the carpet, acting out a scene from Sponge Bob Square pants. When she last saw her, she was barely six. A little girl, with glitter on her nails and butterflies tucked in her braids. She was a fragile being, that girl; too afraid, too cautious, with eyes always filled with unshed tears threatening to fall.
But this girl on the carpet is almost 10 years old. Her voice; radiant with confidence. Her laughter; shook the room to its core. Her beautiful eyes glistened with enthusiasm, with joy, with life.
It could’ve taken her breath away, if she wasn’t already: a breathless ghost.
She looked at Mayed,
Standing tall, with a giggling smile, that reminded her of summer days. That boy who knocked on doors before entering; who hid chocolate bars at every corner. She remembered how his pockets were always overflowing with gum wrappers and how his heart contained the world. How he’ve grown, how he became. How articulate were those sentences he uttered, and how poetic was that laugh. Her knees felt weak, and her fingers could almost trace his face.
And then there was Haloka and Mais, or so she used to call them. Huddled in the corner, absorbed in their own version of the game. Their voices, thick with liveliness, trying to fit everything that needed to be said.
She’ve last seen them communicating with singular words; random shreds of childish thoughts. But now, their conversations were sentences, a beginning to an end and an end to a beginning. She broke to pieces at that sight, at the cruelty of life, and how it snatched all this away, or she was the one that had been snatched too soon. She would never be part of this again, they were merely people in somebody else’s story now, not hers, and never will be. All she could do, was raise that mental camera she held onto so tightly, and take a photograph of that beautiful but heart wrenching reality.
CLICK.
And she dissipated into the nothingness she thought she became.
Only she didn’t know, that she was right there, in each and every one of them.

"And if you were with me tonight,
I'd sing to you just one more time.
A song for a heart so big,
god couldn't let it live. "

Posted by Diddlina at 10:53 AM